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Death is life's way of telling you you're fired. The Deadpool

Wed, 7th May 2014, 10:47

Time for another deadpool already! 2014 marches on, and not everyone has been able to keep up. April was a relatively light month… What's that adage, April showers bring May flowers! Could be a sign that the webhost mortality rate is on the decline. Probably not, all things considered.

 

CubicWebs

Notice on CubicWebs homepage says the company is going out of business  

You know, as much fun as we poke at hosts that go bust, we have to take a minute to appreciate the way CubicWebs has handled it. After clear signs of danger to come, they stopped taking on new customers, sent out notices well in advance of closing, and now they’ve finally gone. Hats off for going out with dignity.

 

SmackHunt

Tips for new hosting providers: try to pick a name for your service that isn’t a euphemism for ‘heroin search’. Most of the slack will be picked up by sister provider HorseFind, we hear. Customers are apparently really addicted.

 

HostPany

“HostPany will save you big and teach you things over the competition.” Well sign me up! They also promise a FREE ebook that teaches how to make a living online! Holy crap, what a deal! I wonder if they can connect us to some Nigerian princes who need to move money around. Guess we’ll never know.

 

Broadline Networks

Broadline went out of business, we can assume, for wasting a perfectly good name for a phone dating service. “Hello, welcome to Broadline. What type of broad can we connect you to today?” Nobody better steal that idea. We’ll sue the crap out of you.

 

TronicHost

TWO letters. TWO measly letters away from all the chronic jokes we could cram into one deadpool, all for a company that folded right around 4/20. Thanks for nothing, TronicHost. Tell you what, this is one tough job sometimes.

 

FiberVolt

Quiet on Twitter, quiet on Facebook. These guys melted into the ether without a peep. From their service description: “The hosting market is over-saturated with companies appearing and disappearing everyday.” And how!

 

Enotchnetworks

For quite some time these guys have been taking a pounding on that forum with the partisan webhosts spouting the only unbiased hosting reviews on the web jargon.  Structural problems can topple even a relatively old host, and it seems like the attrition finally got to these guys.

 

Apple Domains

Oh my gosh, Apple went out of business? How?! They just won their court case against Samsung and everything, how could they h… oh. Apple Domains.in. Ohhhh India. That’s not the same fruit at all.

 

HostDoes

A host is as a host does, and right now this host doesn’t resolve, so you should probably get your services elsewhere.

 

Barak Hosting

Oh sure, just go and close on us right when we need hosting services. That’s totally fine. Thanks, Obama.

 

Looking for a new webhost. Choose wisely and read the reviews! 

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